KEN MIDKIFF DECEMBER 21, 2007

Cold and in the dark

In the year 2057:

“Daddy?”

“Yeah, I’m right here.”

”I’m hot and I can’t see you in the dark.”

“It is a bit warm.”

“No, it’s hot and it’s dark and I can’t sleep.”

“We can’t turn on the AC, because there’s no electricity. Same thing with the lights.”

“Why ain’t there no electricity?”

“Don’t say ‘ain’t’. But, there’s no electricity tonight because the government ordered all the power plants that burn coal to shut down because of all the global warming problems.”

“Why can’t we get electricity somewhere else?”

“Because years and years ago, everyone decided to get their electricity from coal-burning power plants. They thought the plants would clean themselves up with some experiments. But the experiments didn’t work, the plants didn’t clean up and now they are shut down, and because no one supported the wind plants, they couldn’t make it. They went bankrupt, so there’s not much electricity anywhere. But, we do get a little bit for a few hours from some dams, so we’ll have electricity for about three hours tomorrow afternoon.”

“You said ‘everyone decided’. Who were all these people?”

“Oh, mostly elected people in towns and cities and states across the country. Some federal officials, too. You know, the EPA, Federal Energy Commission, Congress. Even the Governor and the President. Other people like that.”

“Didn’t they know we’d be hot and in the dark?”

“They were told, but they decided it was more important to keep doing things the way things had been done ever since they could remember. All the business people, from international companies like Halliburton right down to our local Chamber of Commerce, said they needed cheap electricity and getting it cheap meant getting electricity from power plants that used coal. There were quite a few people who told the elected people that they were making a big mistake. These people were considered ‘kooks’.”

“But, what happened to all the business people?”

“They’re in the same boat we are. No electricity. All the businesses in town are shut down and not many people have work. The business people are at home – sweating in the dark, just like us.”

“Daddy?”

“Yeah.”

“What are we going to do?”

“There’s nothing to do about it in the long run, I guess. It’s too late to do anything and it’s probably going to get hotter this summer. But, you’d better enjoy the heat, because come winter, no matter how bundled up we are, we’re going to shiver in the dark. Right now, though, maybe we’d better go sleep outside – it may be a bit cooler on the porch.”

“How come we’re gonna get cold in the winter? It’s called global warming and I thought things are supposed to get warmer.”

“The weather will be warmer, but it’ll still be kind of cold in the wintertime – but not nearly as cold as it was about 50 years ago. Now, let’s go outside.”

“Okay, Daddy. I’ll get my air mattress, but I’ll need to blow it up and that’ll take some time. The electric air pump don’t work.”

[This first appeared in the Columbia Daily Tribune.]